{"id":645,"date":"2013-07-10T13:32:42","date_gmt":"2013-07-10T17:32:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theroacheshavenoking.com\/RoachesBlog\/?p=645"},"modified":"2013-07-10T13:32:42","modified_gmt":"2013-07-10T17:32:42","slug":"now-where-will-we-get-our-feces","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/?p=645","title":{"rendered":"Now where will we get our feces?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/2013\/07\/10\/now-where-will-we-get-our-feces\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter  wp-image-648\" alt=\"GooseWaste\" src=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/GooseWaste-1024x682.jpg\" width=\"584\" height=\"388\" \/><\/a>This is too rich.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">DALLAS, N.C.\u00a0\u2014 Dozens of people have gathered in a Gaston County park for a memorial service for 144 Canadian geese that were euthanized by county workers worried they had become a health hazard.<\/p>\n<p>The service Friday night included 144 fresh-cut daisies and carnations and songs. Several people at the service discussed putting together a rescue group for geese.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>During the mid 20th century, when the population of this giant, vicious, destructive animal was in natural balance, you &#8220;protected&#8221; it. \u00a0Its numbers went crazy. \u00a0Today it collides with planes, destroys gardens, attacks people, and shits all over your\u00a0\u00a0lawns, parks, streets, ponds, and children. When someone makes a tiny corrective measure, you mourn.<\/p>\n<p>A simple calculation:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/c-poop.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-647\" alt=\"c poop\" src=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/c-poop-300x284.jpg\" width=\"300\" height=\"284\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>This means that every year, Canadian geese produce 4,175,600,000\u00a0pounds&#8211;more than two million tons!&#8211;of shit. \u00a0That&#8217;s three times the amount of butter produced in the entire country.<\/p>\n<p>Why not kill the geese, and just smear the butter all over your lawns, parks, streets, ponds, and children?<\/p>\n<p>Let me remind you that this is what dung beetles do with excrement: roll it away, then recycle it.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/dungbeetle.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-545\" alt=\"dungbeetle\" src=\"http:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/RoachesBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/05\/dungbeetle-300x225.jpg\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Who mourns the slain beetles?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is too rich. DALLAS, N.C.\u00a0\u2014 Dozens of people have gathered in a Gaston County park for a memorial service for 144 Canadian geese that were euthanized by county workers worried they had become a health hazard. The service Friday &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/?p=645\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/645"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=645"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/645\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=645"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=645"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danielevanweiss.com\/BlogRoaches\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=645"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}